Oh. It's because we're slackers, isn't it?
(No, it's because we're training to fight zombies on the mooooooon. Fuck yeah.)
It's nice to be reminded that I have a total fucking thing for suspenders. God. Damn.
Especially when they're hanging around the waist. Ngggh. My heart's located in my pants, right? (What is this feeling I'm feeling?)
I'm supposed to be writing other stuff but okay, like, here are a couple of drabble/sentence fics I wrote this weekend over at kurt_blaine's Holiday Rush Fic Fest
Silent Hill Jokes? Is That Silent Hill Jokes?
For rionaleonhart's prompt: Kurt/Blaine in Silent Hill.
"Radio? Hmm. What's going on with that radio?"
"It's playing Michael Buble."
"Oh. So what are the nurses supposed to represent exactly? My fear of breasts?"
Kurt, help me. Kurt, save me.
"Rachel? Is that Rachel?"
"Let's ask that creepy, mysterious lady that looks angry. Hi, I'm Kurt Hummel and I'm looking for a little, annoying diva. Just turned 17 last month. Short, bad haircut. Have you seen her?"
"You must use the Flauros to defeat this nightmare!"
"I'd rather not. That looks kind of tacky."
"It's okay, Kurt," Blaine says, "I think I got it covered."
"I got a shotgun."
I will not be grateful for Phelous's hysterical Silent Hill Let's Play
Tell Me, Where is Sir Blaine For I Much Desire to Speak to Him
Prompt by lextempus: Kurt/Blaine Crossover with Lord of the Rings
"They're taking the hobbits to--"
"We KNOW, Legolas," Kurt hissed, tired of him always stating the obvious. "To Isengard, to Isengard."
They're Taking the Hobbits to...somewhere
But maybe you'd rather sing about acute boys
Prompt by naderegen: Blaine helping Kurt out with his math/science/whatever homework.
"No," Kurt says, slamming the textbook shut. "I can't take this anymore. We're not going to sing about sexy hypotenuses anymore."
Blaine, fingers still curled over his guitar, looks at Kurt in shock. "What about acute triangles?"
There's a very good way to explain to Blaine that singing (really, flirting through song) is probably the least helpful study method ever and Kurt's counting the time that his Earth Science teacher told everyone to watch Dante's Peak to understand volcanoes.
It involves being honest and awkwardly stumbling over how hard he is crushing on Blaine but that method has proven to be useless because Blaine is still in front of him serenading him with a guitar and he still doesn't realize that, no, this is not the best way to assist Kurt with his homework.
Unlike math, which for now, is just theory that doesn't mean a lick of sense to him, a leap of faith, no an action, that'll certainly explain everything.
Really, he wish he had prepared a little, because his lips are dry but that doesn't matter because the moment his mouth is on Blaine's, there's this little muffled gasp and if there wasn't a guitar sandwiched between them, it would be kind of freaking amazing.
"Oh," Blaine says.
"Yes," Kurt says. "Oh."
"Um," Blaine says, as though he's trying desperately to re-learn how to form proper words, "I'll let you finish this and maybe we could pick this up later?"
Honestly. Blaine really has no idea. Kurt'll just finish his homework in the morning. The guitar's put on the ground before another thought is spared to triangles.
Yes my Earth Science teacher really told my class that. Fun times at Reg's High.
Darren Criss thank you for your time.
My life is now a Countdown to Infinite