I was a taller girl too, once. (regala_electra) wrote,
I was a taller girl too, once.

everything falls apart, the center cannot hold...

I need to get off my ass and start looking for a new job. And if I write it here, maybe I'll listen to my inner voice and actually do something about it.

The situation at work is not of the good, I'm unable to stop my fucking crush on That Guy (aka BILTF, and if you get what those letters stand for, you get a cookie), I'm being treated like crap and expected to do double the amount of work because we're almost always short-staffed, and no, I simply must stop working there. I can't stand it anymore.

I have to write a reaction to a poem called "Sex Without Love." It's about how you can't have sex unless you're in a relationship. I skimmed it once (it's really short), and I cry "bullshit." I'm thinking of writing a poem IN response to the ideas of the poem, only go the "sex is good, everyone can do whatever they want" route. I don't know, that poem rubbed me the wrong way.

Either I was wired completely different from everyone else, or I am indeed insane to think it's possible to have sex, enjoy it, and not require to be IN LURVE in order to have a happy, healthy life. I mean, I'd like the relationship, but I don't need it. Maybe I'm an alien. Or I'm really a guy. A gay guy that likes pretty men. Mmmm...Lex. *g*

The relationship paper I wrote for my class, I took the position that the dating situation/riuals now are good, or at least, beneficial from my POV, that is, as a single, indepedent woman. I don't need a man, and if I want one, it isn't going to define my life.

However, several of the women in my classes said that dating now wasn't so great and there was a lot of "if a woman dates a lot, she's a whore." I heard "whore," "slut," and "promiscuous" thrown around loosely in class discussion a whole lot and it kind of disturbs me. Is a woman in control of her body and her sexual actions really a slut? Is it so bad to free and enjoy one's self?

Why is it that a man can still sleep around and fuck as many girls as he likes, but if a woman does that, she's a whore? It just grates my nerves that that is the accepted party line. Women want relationships, men want sex, and for some reason I'm stuck in the middle, either's nice and yeah, I still want to check "yes, please" on forms that ask about "sex."

I don't think I've formed any opinions or theories, but that's okay, as I don't know what the hell I'm talking about. I just feel like it's wrong for me, a woman, to have a sex drive, to want sex and not need to be "in love," and happy without dating anyone.

Maybe it's just the late hour and I'm overthinking things.
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